The gay naked yoga person next door is driving me crazy playing his gay naked yoga music all day with the gay naked yoga men chanting. I CAN’T STAND IT!!!!!!!! Anyway…I’m blasting this Euro trash/pseudo Indian bar music to counteract it. This is really giving me a headache. My mom told me to make a piece about it to get it out of my system. That was her third suggestion which I’m taking her up on. Her first suggestion was to come into the studio earlier. I explained, that I go out at night and that coming into the studio early wasn’t an option, like, why should I, change my important schedule to accommodate the gay naked yoga people when they don’t give a shit about disrupting me. "What is that music I hear in the background," my mom said. I told her it was this dreadful lounge music I’d bought by accident. I share my studio in Chelsea with the man I’m subletting from who’s a sculptor conservator for Princeton University, so my mom said, "Imagine how the both of you must be driving John crazy…"…no doubt, I thought. Anyway, her second suggestion was that I pray to Krishna to make him go away, which, under the circumstances,, I didn’t think was the worst idea. That, by the way is ‘Ganesh’, not Krishna. I called up my friend of Indian decent who lives in a ‘Classic Six’ on the Upper East Side (‘Classic Six’, is the buzz word of late, that I just can’t stand. I’m finding that everyone is just itching to stick it into a sentence) and getting ‘California Closets’ to make their extra room into a closet (the room is the size of my apartment), and asked her what the name of that Elephant is that has all the arms. Then, asked her if it had anything to do with Yoga, and she said his name is Ganesh and I could use him, it was fine…I told her that the gay naked yoga people were driving me crazy and she said, "Oh," so I said, ‘bye’. Nothing ever phases her. Well, they finally stopped saying ‘ummmmmmm’ and playing that awful music. I didn’t mind it at first, a year and a half ago, but everyday…at three p.m. …-take a gun and shoot me. When my dreadful lounge music stopped, I noticed there was silence all around me except for John typing and listening to N.P.R. . My mother told me, that I must be endless entertainment for him and his wife over dinner. –(an hour later)- Well, it turns out Ganesh is the God you pray to, to overcome obstacles, so even though I think he looks cool, he’s also appropriate given the circumstances. I went to this gallery opening and told my friend Bethany and she said that I should just ask them to turn it down before five – so I emailed them which forced me to have to go searching through their web site and look at all these photographs of gay naked yoga people to find their email address which actually was somewhat entertaining – anyway, they wrote back immediately and said, "Sure!…no problem at all!! We’re really sorry we were bothering you!" – but of course this screwed up my whole piece – so, as my friend with the ‘Classic Six’ said to me about praying to Ganesh, "Be careful what you wish for…".